I love texting. Its very useful. But I think the over-reliance on texting and the apparent avoidance of actual phone calls has become too pronounced. And I admit it… I have been a chronic texter for some time. I am blessed with many friends, and a very tight-knit family who also seem to have a fondness for texting. Although a few of them will call me and sometimes out of the blue, which I love love love! Its just so easy to pop out a text or share a photo or silly meme. I get it. I just wish people would call more. I wish I would call more! I wish we all felt more comfortable picking up the phone and calling without reservations.
Very recently I began to call family members and friends out of the blue — meaning without the complicated preamble of scheduling a phone call meetup or “pre-texting.” So far its gone really well! A few people were so surprised, even a bit alarmed, asking if everything was okay. Some were just a little bit uncomfortable, but they were very welcoming, and I kept it short if I sensed that they were busy. I have had some wonderful, spur of the moment conversations that I might never have had. It was awesome! It was refreshing! And I hope it catches on!
Back in the “old days,” before texting, if somebody called us and we were busy, we could let it go to the answering machine (the voicemail of yesteryear) and it was no biggie… Or we could answer the phone and just say “Sorry, but I’m busy right now. Can I catch up with you later?” There didn’t even need to be a defined “later.” If the caller sounded anxious or especially disappointed, though, we might ask them how important it is and/or just stop what we’re doing to talk. What a concept! Sometimes we would ask the caller “Can I call you back in an hour?” Regardless, there was no drama involved at all. Or hurt feelings on either end. There was also mutual trust among our friends that if one person couldn’t take the other’s call, it did not reflect on our friendship. That was fabulous!
I think maybe people (except for our very closest friends or family members) have some anxiety about just “out of the blue” calling other people. I think people, including me, are afraid we are interrupting or bothering the other person by calling. Will I call them at a bad time? (So what! We used to risk that without fear and nobody died). Maybe there is a subtle fear of rejection. Maybe it’s just become so out of the ordinary, that it feels WEIRD. Does it feel weird to you? I know it does to me, but I’m still gonna keep doing it! Dammitall, back in my sales days, we called it “cold calling,” and it was the only way to go most of the time. You did it or you didn’t pay your bills that month.
Basically, I really miss the beautifully organic, wonderful surprise of hearing from a friend or family member. And calling them and having either a quick chat OR a long discussion about life in general. That lovely spontaneity was magical. So get ready! I may be calling you soon!
