I’ve been thinking about right speech lately. I try to check my intention before, during and after I speak. Do I fail sometimes? Of course. And sometimes I have to learn to just shut my dang cake hole. Knowing when to be silent and listen has always been difficult for me. But don’t we all make mistakes? Have our challenges? For me, and based on what I have learned from Buddhism and my own experience, right speech has a lot to do with intention. If my intention is be loving, kind, helpful and truthful (first hand experience), then I speak it and try to have have confidence in myself. If I have already spoken or written without even one or several of these things, there is a lesson to be learned, and I try to contemplate on it to become a better person in the future. Right speech is, in my experience on my Buddhist path, one of the most difficult to practice. For me, it has been the most challenging! But what we say or write causes never-ending ripples in the pond of life and everyone is affected by it. Therefore, the practice of right speech is so worth the effort! Right speech, when continuously practiced with mindfulness throughout one’s life, can bring ourselves and others so much joy, clarity and peace!
Reflecting on this past year, 2023… it was, in a lot of ways, a really nightmarish year for my family, for me, personally, and for many of my friends and their families. But… I choose to look at things holistically because I believe if you really look carefully, honestly and fearlessly (if you have that capacity) at any really dark situation or problem, there is always some light there, too. So I choose to celebrate the good in my life today:
My beloved friends and family, including my precious fur and scale babies who are most definitely my family, the parts of my body that are still in very good health, the wealth of awareness and wisdom I have acquired about myself and others BECAUSE of conflict, challenge and loss, emotional and physical pain, the peace of mind that I have gained through my meditation, mindfulness practice and wonderful teachers and two wonderful Buddhist sanghas, my comfortable, safe home with a little bit of beautiful green space full of creatures, my ability to move about in nature and sigh in wonder, joy and gratitude for it, my ability to breathe fresh air without obstruction every day, my ability to think clearly without dysfunction (well, most of the time! 😂), my ability to read and write, which has opened doors to the entire world, my continuous access to sustenance and medical care, easy transportation and the freedom that comes with that, living in a country that protects our many other precious freedoms, the ability to hear beautiful music and see beauty which both lift my spirit so high, my sense of humor and courage to be silly, my kindness, which has been my anchor and my bedrock throughout my life and above all… my ability to see that there is no “my” or “me” since we are all connected and interdependent and can choose NOT to hurt each other but to ease each others’ suffering, join hands, and dance together in the light of LOVE!
Feel free to share this with anyone you care about… This world needs tolerance, kindness, love and peace, more than ever! And so much depends upon right speech and the practice of gratitude.
PS Thank you to the photographer (whoever it is) of this lovely horizon image. I saw it somewhere, without credits and saved it for a day just like today. If you know who took it, please let me know!
1 comment:
I understand that the post was not addressed to me personally and was written for a wider audience. Nonetheless, the timing and content closely mirrored the situation that had unfolded only days earlier, and it functioned as a public moral framing of events that had very real and private consequences for me and my sister.
What concerns me is not that you reflected publicly on your spiritual practice, but that your reflection centered intention, silence, gratitude, and personal growth while omitting any acknowledgment of the specific harm your actions caused. In doing so, the post resolved your internal conflict in a public space while leaving the people affected by your actions unrecognized and unprotected.
Right Speech, as taught in Buddhism, is not only about intention or self-reflection. It is also about impact, responsibility, and non-harming. When you chose to inform my mother that I was gathering and sharing evidence, the result was retaliation, threats toward my sister, and my subsequent isolation from the family. Those outcomes are not abstract. They are not philosophical. They are the direct result of that decision.
A public reflection on peace and gratitude that does not name or account for these consequences creates a narrative in which harm disappears and responsibility dissolves. That is not neutrality, and it is not wisdom. It is resolution without accountability.
I am not asking for a public correction, an explanation, or a debate about doctrine. I am stating clearly that the way this situation was handled — privately and publicly — was not consistent with non-harming or Right Speech, regardless of intention
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